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Kanye West Replacing Reality With His Version

Good for Kanye on the Jay Leno show.  Like I thought, Kanye is dealing with his emotions, has some unresolved things and wasn’t aware in the moment how his actions were affecting someone else.

Kanye explains the award show was not going how he expected it to.  He took action in the moment to make reality match his expectations.  Folks who attempt to “correct” reality with relationships and situations are setting themselves up for a lifetime of hurt.

Losing Control

There are people out there who like to be in charge.  When they find themselves in a situation where they are not in control, they can feel all sorts of things; angry, confused, trapped, ashamed…and lash out as they attempt to gain control.

Boundaries

I draw the line when people attempt to control me.   Boundaries are about drawing lines in the “sand” to establish what you feel comfortable with.  I’ve found that I don’t need to spell my boundaries out to everyone but I have needed to sit down with several folks and lay out “the rules” which include:

  • Don’t call me after 8pm CST (friends and clients)
  • I am not the Geeksquad so don’t think of me as your emergency IT support
  • Clients need to pay promptly
  • Don’t abuse my helpful nature
  • Don’t think I’m attracted to you just because I’m helpful
  • Don’t call me to dump on me about how bad your day was
  • Don’t BS me about stuff you never plan to do
  • Don’t project your shortcomings onto me

Past those big things, I’m pretty easy going.  I’ve learned in the last few years that people really do treat you the way you allow them.  I thought long and hard about what affects my energy levels, what are my pet peeves and what sort of company I really enjoy.

Judging Others

On Twitter, people were saying all sorts of things about Kanye.  Most importanly, they were judging him.  Since I don’t own a TV, I didn’t actually see the VMA awards but did catch a clip on YouTube within a few hours.  What I saw was a set of actions based on a set of feelings which I couldn’t see.

Kanye Moving Forward

Now that I’ve watched the Jay Leno clip, I feel Kanye is aware his actions were not appropriate and he seems to regret what he did, wants to make amends and correct his impulsive behavior in the future.  Hats off Kanye!

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  • http://twitter.com/bbetances Brandon Betances

    you…dont own a TV? its 2009 dude.

  • http://www.brandbuildsell.com/2009/09/how-to-make-a-website/ how to make a website

    i own a tv. but rarely watch anything related to popular culture. so i didnt see the show, but watched clips online. i thought kanye was rude and inappropriate, but i also felt very sad for him. not sure if it has anything to do with the death of his mother, but he seems very sad, angry and maybe even depressed.

    if u ever go back and listen to his earlier music, he had so much promise. his words meant something. his music gave hope that rappers were actually thinking about the bigger picture and the future of hip-hop. i respected him because he talked about more than just girls, money and cars.

    so while i think kanye has morphed into kind of a jerk, knowing where he came from its more sad than anything. plus i’m sure his current “company” and handlers are probably adding fuel to the fire instead of trying to find the cause of the flame.

    arsha

    ps. nice post. i secretly stalk your blog. never had a reason to comment until today. thanks for luring me out of my cave. lol

  • http://archerfaith.webs.com/ Veronica

    I watched the VMA clips on MTV after the show. I was stunned when he walked on stage. It was exciting did not know what to expect. Then Kanye spoke those words and Beyonce began to remove her self from a bad situation immediately.

    Kayne's embarrassment in himself was apparent right away. Certain members of the audience immediately went to protect there own (Taylor).
    I probably would have done the same.

    I believe in my heart Kanye is a stand up guy. He is from the Chi and so am I.
    The strong family values his mom's instilled in Kayne are distorted and muffled by his obvious pain.
    I agree with Kanye. He does need time to heal, renew his faith, and just be.

  • http://archerfaith.webs.com/ Veronica

    I watched the VMA clips on MTV after the show. I was stunned when he walked on stage. It was exciting did not know what to expect. Then Kanye spoke those words and Beyonce began to remove her self from a bad situation immediately.

    Kayne's embarrassment in himself was apparent right away. Certain members of the audience immediately went to protect there own (Taylor).
    I probably would have done the same.

    I believe in my heart Kanye is a stand up guy. He is from the Chi and so am I.
    The strong family values his mom's instilled in Kayne are distorted and muffled by his obvious pain.
    I agree with Kanye. He does need time to heal, renew his faith, and just be.