Today I was talking with @Nurkirk on Skype. All of a sudden, he turned into his cat self!

It was quite a surprise but I guess we all have another side to share.

This image was brought to you by a Dell 1542. Nukirk reports it has better facial tracking than the HP webcams.

Chad’s hug was firm but hugging a 6 foot+ tall guy dressed like a Comic-Con Geek’s birthday wish / worst nightmare was a bit…different.

Check out Chad Vader getting Freaky

You can follow Chad Vader on Twitter, watch more funny videos on his YouTube Channel and visit his website.

When I first saw this video, was a bit concerned but Violet’s narrative had me cracking up!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Turns out Violet’s a sexologist so this must seem completely tame to her!

To this end they’ve made (among other things like cool stickers) a series of help desk agent appreciation videos. Lucky for us — they made a naughty one, and it seems to be pulled directly from the steamier pages of our sexy-geek obsessed brains. I’m thinking of it more as a potential script. It’s one in a series of three videos that are part of their campaign aimed at supporting help desk agents: the campaign itself isn’t sex specific, except for this one funny video they created. Thanks Zendesk! You rock in oh so many ways. Thank you for taking care of me, and Laughing Squid!

See, she pointed out the innocent side of geek sexuality. That fumbling, awkward sort of geeky pleasure. The kind where it stays on your mind the next afternoon. Now, I’m not talking about sex toys specifically but rather that youthful sort of romance we’ve all experienced that leaves you with a silly grin.

Now is this video hot? As a straight geek girl, I don’t think so. Maybe this is enough to get some guys “stirred up”. I want to see some biceps! Give me some hard core tech terms! See, this is why I thought The Matrix was hot. It had biceps and Linux (Matrix digital rain)! The gal in the video should have whipped out her laptop and then called tech support. Or, she could of had a vibrator that was powered by her USB port. Now that’s geeky!

I found this video less offensive than Microsoft’s breakfast porn for Internet Explorer 8 and DimDim’s French Maid’s in lingerie pushing their conference software.

• What do you find to be hot and geeky?
• When sex is part of advertising for technology, does it matter if the plot doesn’t support the technology?

I was always a stickler for continuity and that’s why I liked Star Trek but disliked The Outer Limits.

via love the help desk? thought you’d never ask… | violet blue ® :: open source sex.

Genre Windows Remix Videos via Techman1038 on ustream.tv

Click here to view the embedded video.

The Chanukah Song II by Adam Sandler
http://blueturtlehosting.com/share/Chanukah_Song_II-Adam_Sandler.mp3

So there’s always that uncomfortable discussion people have around the holidays about how to wish other people a good holiday season.

Some people think you should wish everyone based on the religion you are; some feel a generic greeting that is all inclusive is the way to go…some get downright insane and turn the whole season into a guilt ridden, consumer driven shopping spree full of commercial jingles and measures of self worth based on the gift.

I’m profoundly grateful and happy to be celebrating another year passing.  Surrounded by positive people who are friends, collaborators, mentors and overall good folks has made this year simply amazing.  They inspire me to be more than I am and to contribute to something greater than myself as I observe them doing.  Thank you all you wonderful people!

Photo Credit striatic

Now how can I share this inner joy? By sharing this! A friend sent me both of Adam Sandler’s Chanukah songs so I present them here for your enjoyment.

Lyrics hand typed with love.  If you see (??) that means I need your help figuring out the word.  Feel free to drop a note on any corrections!

The Chanukah Song

(applause)
(ok)

This uh, This is a song that a, there’s a lot of Christmas songs out there and uh, not too many Chanukah songs so, uh, I wrote this song for all those nice Jewish kids who don’t get to hear any Chanukah songs.

Here we go

Put on your yamikah, here comes Chanukah,
so much funnikah, to celebrate Chanukah

Chanukah is, the festival of lights
Instead day of one day of presents, we have eight crazy nights

When you feel like the only kid in town, without a Christmas tree,
Here’s a list of people who are Jewish, just like you and me,

David Lee Roth, lights the Menorah,
So do Jamie Khon, Kirk Douglas and the late Dinah Shore(a),

Guess who eats together at the Carnegie deli?
Bowser from Sha Na Na and Arthur Fonzerelli

**To Be continued**

The Chanukah Song II

(applause)

Time to take out the Menorahs

Put on your Yamikah, it’s time for Chanukah,
So much funnikah, to celebrate Chanukah

Chanukah is, the festival of lights,
Instead day of one day of presents, we get eight crazy nights,

When you feel like the only kid in town, without a Christmas tree,
Here’s a new list of people who are Jewish, just like you and me,

Winona Ryder, drink Manishevitz wine,
Then spins a Dradle with Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein,

Guess who gives and receives loads of Chanukah toys?
The girls from (??) and all three Beastie Boys,

Lennie Kravitz is half Jewish, Courtney Love is half too,
Put them together, what a funky badass Jew!

We got Harvey Keitel, and Flashdancer Jennifer Beals,
Yasmin Bleeth from Baywatch is Jewish and yes her boobs are real,

Put on that Yamikah, it’s time for Chanukah,
Two Time Oscar winner Dustin Hoffmonikah, celebrates Chanukah,

OJ Simpson…, still not a Jew,
But guess who is?  The guy who does the voice for Scooby Doo,

Bob Dylan was born a Jew, then he wasn’t but now he’s back,
Mary Tyler Moore’s husband is Jewish, ’cause we’re pretty good in the sack,

Guess who got Bar Mitzvah’d on the PGA tour?  No I’m not talking about Tiger Woods,
I’m talking about Mr. Happy Gilmore,

So many Jews are in the show biz, Bruce Springsteen isn’t Jewish,
But my mother thinks he is,

Tell that old harmomonica, it’s time to celebrate Chanukah,
It’s not pronounced Chan-a-kah, the “C” is silent in Chanukah,

So read your Hooked On Phonika, get drunk in Tijuanikah,
If you really wannikah, have a happy, happy, happy, happy Chanukah!

Happy Chanukah!

(applause)
Here’s some love to everybody

A client of mine told me about this Dilbert strip he saw. It provides perspective how a computer user receiving help could be feel about their data privacy.

What they don’t consider is all the crap I have to look at on computers owned by men between the ages of 30-60!

[inline]

[script src="http://app.sgizmo.com/s/survey_js2.php?id=J37XG7ZWGMILUISG7V1JWE8BBZEWRX-89248" type="text/javascript"][/script]
[/inline]

Remote Support Options

One of the first tools I used for remote support was PC Anywhere, VNC and Remote Desktop.  Before the introduction of remote support, helpdesk and support staff had to walk people through fairly complex actions like restoring pst files in Outlook, reinstalling Windows and booting into safe mode to remove spyware so you can only imagine how much fun that was.

Helping people with remote support became faster and easier (note: not the same as fast and easy).  I’m still glad I got started with supporting computers through the phone because I developed my ability to visualize and communicate using only words.  This is huge because computer support is really about trust.  It’ a leap of faith for computer users to click on things just because someone on the other line says you should.

Internally, most companies I worked for used IP addressees on the local network to get users and support staff connected.  VPN’s extended this support to people in the field.  After I struck out on my own, I needed a tool that could easily connect me to people located anywhere in the world.  It would leap over firewalls in a single bound.  It would transparently connect me where no one had connected before.  Front offices and back rooms filled with servers…I would be there in moments.

That tool has been Logmein.  They have several products I use, including Hamachi for a software VPN but my mainstay has been Logmein Rescue which allows for a smart, fast and flexible remote support solution and I’ve been using their solution since 2006. I love using Logmein. It’s fast, effective, easy to use, easy for the people I help, supports Mac OSX, supports mobile devices, is affordable and has a ton of powerful features including reboot into Safe Mode.

Data Protection

A common theme I’ve seen in tech support is that people underestimate what they need to protect their computer files and don’t think twice about what happens when they hand over their personal information to companies.  Did you know that your dentist, accountant or daycare center can lose your name, address, number of children, birth dates, places of employment and not have to worry about legal prosecution from the State of Minnesota?

It’s understandable people may feel suspicious of the person helping them.  Sometimes they’re projecting their own trust issues or don’t want their actual problem fixed…as strange as that sounds.   Imagine someone brings their dying dog to the vet. It not only has a massive heartworm infection (spyware and viruses) but it hasn’t been fed the right food and is pathetically skinny. If the dog dies after seeing the vet, common sense would not blame the vet but the highly emotional and frantic pet owner may. Such is the wrath the IT person must bare.

This story plays out all across the nation everyday
Computer person: I found your problem. Your wireless network is wide open so anyone can access your files so this is causing your computer to get infected.
Computer user: I just want the viruses to stop
Computer person: I should secure the network, uninstall Limewire and scan your computer offline
Computer user: Why do you need to do all that? I told you what the problem is
Computer person: Yes, and I’m telling you what will need to be done
Computer user: Well, I don’t think that needs to be done. Just clean off the viruses
Computer user (1 month later): That computer person wasn’t very good. My computer still has a bunch of viruses

Visa has a great page which describes the type of computer network security measures they expect you to follow if you process credit cards through them. All 12 points are standard meat and potatoes security recommendations for computer networks and I show this list to my clients as a starting or check in point. This list is based on the PCI Data Security Standards (PCIDSS)

The PCI DSS, a set of comprehensive requirements for enhancing payment account data security, was developed by the founding payment brands of the PCI Security Standards Council, including American Express, Discover Financial Services, JCB International, MasterCard Worldwide and Visa Inc. Inc. International, to help facilitate the broad adoption of consistent data security measures on a global basis.

Illegal Downloads

I’ve also seen people shoot themselves in the foot by installing P2P filesharing apps on their business computers.

Fishing for Pron’s in the Sea or “Naughty Surfing”

As a girl techie, I have heard the same story so many times from guys on laptops:

“Oh, my! My son must have got onto the computer and been surfing these sites”.

I just tell them I’m there to fix the computer, not evaluate how they use it.  These days, if you want to use your computer to surf the internet for porn private stuff, it’s a much better idea to download a Live CD of Ubuntu, reboot your computer and go to town.  This saves you the hassle and stress of deleting your temporary files, cookies, history, etc.  Of course, the Geeksquad will miss your pron files but we’re talking about keeping things professional, not sloppy.

“McCain Be Old” – Jelly Doughnut

Jelly first caught my eye with his freestyle in a doughnut suit on Youtube. I saw it around the same time as SNL’s Lazy Sunday and thought he was more entertaining so I share his new video on John McCain.

Update 3: Entire lyrics for “McCain Be Old” song

Yo, this milk is really old,
The Dead Sea Scrolls are pretty old man,
Well, you guys want to know what’s really old?

McCain be old

He witnessed the Big Bang, Oh, he’s old,
He still uses an abacus, how’d he get so old,
He breastfed Strom Thurman, McCain’s old,
He’s a hunter gatherer,

Yo, O-L-D, that’s what McCain be,
Older than the dude with the Grail at the end of Indiana Jones 3, (what)
Everything he touches turns into an antique,
He looks like Skeletor with hella more cheeks, (heh)
He’s older than bacon, (what)
He’s older than Satan, (what)
He’s older than the dude who wrote “The Road Not Taken”, Robert Frost?
Yeah, he’s also older than actual frost,
McCain fought in the coliseum and he lost,

He’s old, he helped build Stonehenge,
Oh My God, He’s old,
He uses the barter system,
He’s so old, he dreams in sepia,
That man is old, he was at Moses’ Briss, (snip, snip)
(old)
He farts dust, that’s really gross and he’s old,
Fire confuses him, because he’s old,
He remembers the Alamo,
He smells, he’s old,
He was around when all the continents were part of one huge land mass commonly referred to as Pangaea,

Obama be a blog, McCain be hieroglyphics,
Obama be a Segway™, McCain be rickets,
Obama be Dippin’ Dots™, McCain be yak milk,
Obama be Jet Blue, McCain be pterodactyl,
Obama be a gold grill, McCain be dentures,
Obama be Facebook, McCain be Friendster,
Obama be (Mac startup sound), McCain be (dial up modem sound),

…Obama be…actually an intelligent, viable, presidential candidate

McCain be old, He makes makes offerings to Zeus,
Yo, he’s old, glow-in-the-dark stuff scares him,
Knock Knock, Who’s there?
(old)
He gave me a Werther’s Original™!
Ring, Who is it?
(old)
He’s two years older than himself, he’s old,
He doesn’t remember you,
He can’t hear you, He’s old,
That bible story is actually McCain and Abel,
He’s Satanic,
He’s friends with dirt,
(old)
He started wearing Depends™ when Obama started wearing Huggies™ (Cheering, Laughing)

Jelly Doughnut –> Hey, whether you’re voting for Obama or Skeletor,
you’ve got to be registered to do it,
it’s easy (http://voteforchange.com)
Do it online by October 6th and then vote November 4th

If there’s something you can correct  help fill in (indicated with ??), contact me by leaving a comment!

Thanks to Laughing Squid